


In bloom

by silvervelour



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: F/F, Nicky sets Jan and Jackie up on a blind date, smut but like not graphic, they're all teachers, very soft beginnings of love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:47:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23517145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silvervelour/pseuds/silvervelour
Summary: Jan shifts, pokes at Jackie’s ribs until she’s squealing, giggling. Jackie squirms away from her touch but it’s futile, impossible. She pleads, places her near empty mug onto the small table next to them as Jan loops her arms around her waist, pulls her closer.Closer still.“You’re just very nice to look at and I am very gay”. Jan emphasises.Her phrasing is stupid, funny, but Jackie understands it because the sentiment is mutual. Looking at Jan is like looking at sunshine, is like being surrounded by the light of golden hour. It’s as if Jan is a summers day and Jackie never wants to escape the heat again.Jan’s gaze is burning through her and she lets it, gladly.
Relationships: Jan Sport/Jackie Cox
Comments: 25
Kudos: 86





	In bloom

**Author's Note:**

> hi all!! i had this idea and i just had to write it, and I'm kind of in love with how it turned out. it's my love letter to love, in a way. these ladies have my heart and I hope you enjoy!!
> 
> as always, huge love to holly for being my rock and always supporting my ideas, and also charl aka the wonderful pinkgrapefruit for cheering me on !
> 
> <3

It’s springtime. 

March has been and gone, left behind its footprint of longer days and warmer nights. April makes itself present through lilac and orange sunsets that cast shadows throughout houses across the town. Thick coats become lighter jackets and car windows get rolled down for the first time in months. 

All of it makes Jan smile. 

She’s able to pad her bare feet across the wooden floors of her bedroom in the mornings without feeling the chill travel up her legs. It means that she can take pleasure in the way each board creaks, and the minutes wait it takes for her coffee to brew. 

Her hands part her embroidered curtains to beams of light and the sound of chirping birds. If she looks closely enough with her glasses then she’s able to see robins hopping along the branches of a cherry blossom in her front yard, the buds having become pink and peach and cream. 

There’s a light misting of dew coating the grass and she lets her breath fog up the pane of her window. She lifts her coffee mug to her lips and in turn steams up her glasses too. Jan doesn’t have the heart to huff about it; she takes them off, places them on her nightstand.

The lenses face downwards but she doesn’t care. 

There are freckles blooming in constellations on her cheeks and she lets the sun kiss at them.

*****

It’s springtime. 

March has been and gone, left behind a sense of burning that’s looming low. April makes it self present in days that drone on for a second too long and sunsets that turn to smoke. Comforting sweaters have to transition to thinner shirts and unsettling air meets speckled skin for the first time in months. 

All of it makes Jackie uneasy. 

The carpeted floor of her bedroom beneath her feet feels too warm in the mornings. It’s a fraction too bright when she cracks open her curtains and she’s forced to squint her eyes. She rubs at them with her knuckles and recoils at the sound of each chirp that the birds on her balcony give.

There’s no frost on her window pane and it’s far from familiar. She makes herself a mug of tea and curses into the empty room when she spills some onto the floor. It’s highlighted by the rays of light blasting from behind the clouds like bullets and she misses the dark of winter. 

Jackie perches on her couch, places the scalding mug down onto the coffee table. 

It’ll leave behind a stain but she doesn’t care. 

The ends of her hair are becoming lighter with each day that passes and she wants to cut them off. 

*****

Jan has her second cup of coffee of the day in a cafe down the street. 

_Heidi’s_ is quaint, but offers a familiar warmth. Jan orders a latte and a muffin, tucks herself into a far corner. Her body is engulfed by a tan leather armchair and she places her tote bag at her feet. There’s a smudge of green paint streaked up the side and jan pictures vines growing from it as she waits. 

Waits longer. 

She flips through a book that’s been left on one of the side tables but doesn’t have the concentration to absorb them. Jan feels giddy with an excitement that she doesn’t understand the root of. There’s coffee thrumming in her blood and she taps her nails against the china of her mug. 

Her phone vibrates in her pocket. 

**_Nicky_ : Yes I’m running late **

**_Nicky_ : I’m around the corner  **

**_Nicky_ : Be there soon **

Jan lets out a quiet laugh. The cafe is loud enough that nobody hears her but Heidi shoots her a smirk across the counter. Jan’s eyes roll as she places her phone back into her pocket, relaxes further into her seat. Nicky doesn’t need a response; Jan’s able to count on one hand how many times Nicky has been on time to anything.

And still have fingers left over. 

Jan doesn’t know whether it’s a French thing, but it’s undoubtedly a _Nicky_ thing and she’d be lying through her teeth if she said it wasn’t endearing, sometimes. It’s why she doesn’t mind waiting another minute, or two, for Nicky to be waving excitedly at her from across the room. 

She orders herself an espresso, and Jan catches Heidi telling her that she’ll bring it over to their table. Nicky smiles gratefully and Jan beckons her with a grin. Jan knows that it’s been mere days since they last saw each other but bounds gladly into Nicky’s arms. 

Nicky chuckles and people do hear them, then. 

“ _Janet_!-“. Nicky jokes. 

“-It’s been years”. She winks. 

Jan snickers as she pulls away. 

“Hilarious, truly”. 

Heidi’s bringing over Nicky’s espresso before they’re able to sit. She sets down a croissant too and assures that it’s on the house. Nicky takes a bite and mumbles something about a _French_ _stereotype_ that Jan doesn’t catch. It makes the both of them smile regardless and their conversation begins like it had never ended. 

Jan’s mid way through her third latte and Nicky has necked back a further four espressos. They joke that Nicky’s not going to be able to sleep for a week and the atmosphere is light, airy. Jan drains the dregs of her coffee and licks at her top lip; the excitement has began to ebb away but there’s still mischief building in Nicky’s eyes. 

“You’re looking at me funny”. Jan notes. 

“Am I?”.

“Yes-“. Jan nods. 

“-Really funny. 

Nicky acts nonchalant. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”. She sings. 

Jan thinks that there’s a reason Nicky isn’t an actress. She tells her as much and Nicky laughs. Jan arches an eyebrow, leans forward in her seat. Nicky mirrors her and props her elbows on the arms of the chair, crosses one leg over the other with confidence. 

“How long have you been single for again?”. Nicky blurts. 

And _no_ , definitely not. 

“Oh no-“. Jan shakes her head. 

“-Not this”. 

It’s not something that she’s keen on discussing. 

_Again_. 

She knows that Nicky has her best intentions at heart, but she’s suffered through enough first dates that Nicky’s set up on her behalf to be skeptical. Nothing has ever come from them with the exception of a free drink here and there, and the prospect of Nicky suggesting another is -

\- Worrying. 

Nicky simply stares her down and Jan knows that she’s going to pry an answer from her. 

“I don’t know”. Jan tries.

“Liar”. Nicky counters. 

Jan knows that she’s transparent. Nicky sees through her like she’s a panel of glass and doesn’t hide the smirk on her face. She twirls a strand of hair around her finger and lets it drop into a ringlet; Jan can only hope that she’ll let the topic of conversation go as quickly.

“Rude-“. Jan scoffs.

“-Six months, maybe?”. 

It’s been six months and one week, but she’s not going to allow Nicky to find out. 

_Six months and one week_ of Nicky coercing her into _getting back out there._

_Six months and one week_ of sleeping alone and buying herself flowers because she can. Sunflowers are her favourite and she displays them in a vase on her bedroom windowsill so that she’s able to see them in the corner of her eye when she’s making herself come better than any partner or date that she’s ever had.

“Baise moi”. Nicky dramatises. 

“I know what that means and no, I won’t”. Jan quips. 

“Well-“. Nicky drawls. 

“-If you’re not ‘gonna fuck me then maybe you’ll let me tell you what I was thinking?”. She grins. 

Jan doesn’t have the fight left within her. 

Her body is warm, and the sun is shining brighter outside than it has since fall. Her skin is free from goosebumps and she has the sleeves of her shirt rolled up. There’s a sense of hope in the air and Jan is happy, optimistic. 

And so she agrees.

“Alright”.

*****

Jackie doesn’t have any plans for the day. 

It’s already past noon, and she’s spent the morning drawing up lesson plans for her theatre kids. It doesn’t matter that it’s the middle of spring break. She’s drank her way through too many cups of herbal tea in an attempt to feel something but all that she feels is disgustingly warm. 

The windows of her living room are constantly assaulted by the sun. 

She feels like a wilting stem cornered in a greenhouse and she knows that drinking scalding tea does nothing to help. It burns all the way down to her stomach and settles unpleasantly; her palms feel clammy as she sets her laptop down and she begins to dread the months that are to come. 

May, June, July.

_August_.

Because Jackie’s never disliked summer before, has never so much as found anything bad about it. 

But something feels off. 

Her house feels too big, too empty. She feels swamped in the space that she’s built over the years, drowned out by the heat that she hasn’t felt since fall. It reminds her of uncomfortable childhood days in Iran and later winters in Canada that she wishes she could get back. 

Jackie brews another cup of tea despite herself and stares down her phone like it’s personally offended her. She decides that maybe it has when it vibrates, three times, and the screen illuminates like a warning. 

**_Nicky_ : Hey babe  **

**_Nicky_ : Can I call you? **

**_Nicky_ : I have a proposition  **

It’s laughable, almost. 

Jackie’s known Nicky since one of her first district teacher conferences. Nicky had been babbling to herself in garbled French about the lack of variety at the buffet table and Jackie had responded with the minimal French that she knew. 

They’d spent the weekend chuckling between themselves in the back row of the hall and Jackie had gone back to teaching classes the following Monday with nothing gained but a friend. Nicky had text her that evening about a lunch catch up the following week and things had become concrete. 

It’s been ten years and countless lunches since then but the sentiment remains the same. 

Except for when Jackie knows that Nicky has other plans. 

**_Jackie_ : If you’re going to set me up on another date then the answer is no**

She types the message with a snicker, and it isn’t lost on her that it’s the first time she’s cracked a smile all day. It feels like the smallest weight lifted and she smiles softly to herself. Her feet walk her back towards the couch and her hand clutches the mug that’s burning her skin.

**_Nicky_ : Can I call you or not? **

Jackie knows that a response from her isn’t going to stop Nicky. 

Her phone rings predictably and she picks up on the second dial. 

“ _Jacqueline_!”. Jackie sets her phone to speaker.

“Hey girl”. Jackie sighs. 

She lays back on her couch, flings her legs up onto the arm rest. She tucks her arm beneath her head and props her phone on her stomach. Nicky’s voice is distorted in her ears so she twists, turns until she’s comfortable. She’s already rambling about _ideas_ and _what if’s_ but they go in one ear and out of the other. 

“What?-“. Jackie asks.

“-Say that again?”. 

Nicky groans, but it’s laced with laughter. 

“You’re not listening to a word I’m saying, are you?”. 

“Absolutely not”. Jackie grins. 

Nicky groans once more. 

“Why doesn’t anybody ever trust me?-”. She jokes. 

“-I have so many good ideas and nobody cares”. 

It’s dramatic and both know it, but it’s funny. They’re able to giggle freely and it distracts Jackie from the hollow feeling in her bones. Nicky starts talking once more and Jackie is listening, this time. 

“Date-“. Nicky states bluntly.

“-Will you go on one?”.

And Jackie will do anything to keep the peace. 

She hums lowly, acknowledges that one more date added to the growing list of failed ones that Nicky’s already set her up on won’t hurt. She’ll get a drink from it, or a meal if she’s lucky, and it’ll be fine. 

It’ll be nice.

“As long as it’s not with you, honey”.

*****

**_Jan_ : Can I get some more info on this date ?? **

**_Jan_ : What does she do??? **

**_Jan_ : Where am I even meeting her? **

**_Jan_ : And also  **

**_Jan_ : Why the fuck did I agree to this  **

**_Jan_ : AGAIN **

**_Jan_ : Nicky!! I have nothing to wear  **

**_Nicky_ : She’s a teacher at Oak High, you’re meeting her at Green’s, and you agreed because you love me **

**_Nicky_ : And wear something hot, this girls cute **

**_Nicky_ : Tables booked for 8! **

*****

**_Jackie_ : Promise me something? **

**_Nicky_ : Depends what  **

**_Jackie_ : If this date is bad then you have to come over and drink all of the alcohol in my house with me **

**_Nicky_ : Deal **

**_Nicky_ : Can’t wait to be sober tonight **

*****

Jan makes a point of being early. 

It’s ten minutes before she’s due to meet her date and the sky is flourishing in pinks and oranges as she rounds the corner. The restaurant is within her sight and the cooling breeze floats easily around her ankles. She’s wearing a lilac dress that clings to her hips, cuts off at her knees, and a pair of kitten heels that she knows she’s going to regret by the end of the night.

If it lasts that long. 

She tosses her hair over her shoulder, feels the tug of the elastic that’s keeping half of it up in a ponytail. Her hands are pushing open the door to the restaurant and she exhales a nervous breath; there’s something nagging pleasantly in her gut and she prays to unknown gods that Nicky is right this time. 

*****

Jackie makes a point of being early. 

She’s sat inside the restaurant a full fifteen minutes before eight. A waitress points her to a table that’s directly in line of sight from the door and she thanks her with a polite smile. The same waitress pours her a glass of wine and Jackie’s mind begins to swirl with the current of it. 

Because she doesn’t know who to look out for, doesn’t know how to break the ice when her blind date becomes real. She doesn’t know why Nicky had been so vague and -

\- Doesn’t understand the excitement that’s weighing heavy on her chest. 

*****

There’s soft music playing.

Jan enters the restaurant with a spring in her step.

Her eyes scan the room and it takes seconds. 

_Jackie_.

***** 

“Jan?”. 

it’s not what Jackie had been expecting. 

_Jan_ isn’t what Jackie had been expecting. 

She trails her eyes across the woman who’s a vision in purple. It’s a soft lilac and Jan has an even softer smile upon her face. Jackie remains cautious but knows that Jan is growing uncomfortable; she purses her glossy lips and arches an eyebrow, places her hands on the back of the chair that’s meant for her. 

Maybe. 

“Please tell me Nicky set you up too or this is about to be a real awkward conversation”. Jan laughs. 

Jackie has to swallow her nerves. 

“I, uh-“. She stutters. 

“- _Yeah_ , yeah, she did”. Jackie confirms. 

Jan nods her head slowly, twiddles her fingers against the leather of the chair. 

“Ok-“. Jan’s smile is tentative. 

But then she’s cursing quietly. 

“- _Fuck_ ”. She laughs. 

Jan shifts her weight from one foot to the other, diverts her gaze. There’s a tension between them that fizzles with the candle that’s lit in the middle of the table. It’s burning through Jackie but she can’t look away from Jan; Jan who she doesn’t know outside of teacher conferences and Jan who’s chancing a fleeting glance back towards her. 

“We don’t have to do this-”. Jackie prefaces. 

“-I’m sorry if this is too weird or-“. She doesn’t get to finish. 

Jan is shaking her head, defiantly. She pulls the chair out from underneath the table, lets her bag slip off of her shoulder. It drops to the floor with a soft clink and Jan sits just as delicately. She looks up towards Jackie from beneath heavy lashes and Jackie can feel the hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention. 

“We don’t have to make it weird, right?”. Jan proposes.

Jackie isn’t so sure.

“Right”. 

Jan gives her an encouraging smile. 

“Come on-“. She coaxes. 

“-We get a night out and Nicky gets to shut up for three seconds, it’ll be fine”. She jokes

And Jackie doesn’t know whether she believes her. 

Because there’s a heat in the pit of her stomach and she doesn’t mind it, for once. 

Jan’s already flicking through the menu, eyes trailing over the list of pasta dishes, and Jackie doesn’t know how she’s so calm. Jackie takes a breath, pulls herself back to the music in the room and the lights that are dim; she decides that she’ll stay and nods her head slowly. 

Even if only to get Nicky to shut up for three seconds. 

“It’ll be fine, yeah, sure”. Jackie echos. 

Jan winks at her then, and when the waitress takes their orders minutes later, Jackie stutters out a dish that she doesn’t even like. 

*****

It doesn’t take long.

They laugh.

They _click_.

And it’s easier than Jan thought it would be.

Jackie’s frown drains along with her wine glass and Jan thinks that Nicky had a point, maybe. Jan’s cheeks are flushed as pink as her rosé and Jackie’s giggling freely, laughing along to an anecdote about _something_. Jan doesn’t know what; she’s been rambling and Jackie has been listening and their glasses are near empty. 

“Ugh-“. Jackie grunts. 

“-Can I make a confession?”. She grimaces. 

Jan has to tear her eyes away from the way that her gold earrings glint against her cheeks, the way that the curls of her hair fall around her shoulders. Jackie’s leant slightly over the table like there’s a secret teetering on her lips and Jan nods excitedly, smirks back at her. 

Jackie pushes her fork around her plate, sighs dramatically. 

“I fucking _hate_ salmon”. She admits. 

Jan could have guessed. 

Jackie’s avoided the salmon like it’s caused her personal harm, has skirted around it in order to get to the potatoes, asparagus. It’s sat untouched on the edge of her plate, and Jan finds herself scowling at it. Her body is warm with the alcohol and she looks back up to Jackie with a lopsided grin. 

“You ordered salmon because you don’t like salmon?”. Jan checks. 

Jackie groans, slouches in her chair. 

“I panicked”. She whines. 

“Oh, baby”. Jan snickers. 

“Don’t do that”. Jackie’s voice is high. 

Jan arches an eyebrow, presses her ankle against Jackie’s beneath the table. Jackie doesn’t flinch away from the contact and Jan takes it as a good sign. She reaches across the table and taps at Jackie’s wrist once. 

Twice. 

“Don’t do what?”. Jan beams. 

Jackie’s blush only intensifies. 

“Never mind-“. Jackie chuckles.

“-Do you want to get out of here?”.

Jan doesn’t think she’s ever said yes quite as quickly.

*****

**_Jackie_ : So  **

**_Jackie_ : Maybe you were onto something  **

**_Nicky_ : I know **

**_Nicky_ : Told you so **

*****

**_Jan_ : Nicola!!! **

**_Jan_ : I have an update  **

**_Jan_ : I’ve had five glasses of wine and Jackie is pretty  **

**_Nicky_ :I know **

**_Nicky_ : Told you so  **

*****

“My feet hurt”. Jan grumbles. 

They’ve been walking for ten minutes, aimlessly.

Jan’s hand is intertwined with Jackie’s and the sun has fully set behind them. The street lamps overhead paint Jan’s face in amber patterns and Jackie wants to trail her fingers across them. Jan drops her head to rest on Jackie’s shoulder and repeats herself lowly. 

“Jackie-“. She drawls. 

“-My feet _really_ hurt”. 

Jackie gives her hand a squeeze, nods her head in understanding. 

“My place is around the corner?”. Jackie offers. 

And Jan perks up instantly. 

“Let’s go!”.

*****

“Oh thank fuck for that”. 

Jan kicks her shoes off before Jackie’s closed the door behind them. 

The hallway is dark, only illuminated by the headlights of cars that pass akin to lighting outside. Jan stumbles and Jackie reaches for the light switch, bathes them in fluorescence. They both squint against it but they’re giggling still, Jackie attempting to undo the straps of her own heels. 

“Finally”. She sighs, letting them drop to the floor. 

Jan leans against the wall, stretches out her toes. 

“God-“. Jan tugs at her dress. 

“-Wish I’d worn something more comfortable”. She huffs. 

Jackie nods her head in agreement, because she gets it. 

The dress she had chosen was uncomfortable at the beginning of the night and still is now. It itches at her skin and bunches awkwardly but it had seemed important, once.

She struggles to remember why when Jan is tugging on her arm once more, pulling Jackie flush against her. 

Jackie lets out a breath of laughter, walks her fingers across Jan’s hip and to the small of her back when Jan offers a minute nod; they’re stood in the corner of Jackie’s hallway at eleven on a Wednesday and it’s still as bizarre as it was three hours earlier.

Neither are complaining. 

“I have a couple of shirts if you want to get out of this dress?”.

*****

Jackie riffles through her chest of drawers, produces a plaid shirt that Jan accepts eagerly. 

She fists her hands into it, teeters on her feet as Jackie directs her to the bathroom. It takes her minutes to change and in that time Jackie swaps her dress for a pair of sleep shorts and a hoodie, tells Jan that she’ll be in the kitchen. 

Jackie is, true to her word, and when Jan emerges from the bathroom she basks in the way that Jackie’s eyes grow hooded, trail across her frame. She’s left the top buttons of the shirt undone and it cuts off at her upper thigh. Her feet are bare but the carpet beneath them is warm. 

_Everything_ is warm. 

“You look cute”. Jackie grins. 

And Jan’s unable to quell her blush, mumbles a quiet _thank you._

There’s a bottle of wine sat on the kitchen counter top and she nods towards it. 

“More wine?”. She questions. 

Jackie produces two mugs, hand painted in rainbows. 

“If you ‘wanna”. 

Jan does. 

So she tells her.

*****

Jackie’s balcony faces west, and the stars twinkle like fireflies.

Jan is already curled up on her bench and Jackie folds her legs to join her. She drapes a knitted blanket around the both of them and passes off both mugs. They fill them with shaking hands and cheers them together with a clank. It echos in the alcove but Jan’s curling up against her and it’s all that matters. 

Jackie places a hand on Jan’s knee, and Jan accepts the invitation, spreads her legs out across Jackie’s lap. They sip from their mugs, bask in the quiet. The only sounds come from Jan’s heavy breathing and the occasional car that passes fleetingly; Jackie doesn’t miss the way Jan blinks up at her when she thinks she isn’t looking and has to bite at the insides of her cheeks to stop her grin from growing. 

“Very subtle”. Jackie smirks. 

Jan splutters, clears her throat. 

Her pupils are blown and Jackie thinks that she could drown happily in the depths of them. 

“Wasn’t trying to be subtle”. Jan laughs. 

“Coulda’ fooled me”. 

“ _Hey_!”. 

Jan shifts, pokes at Jackie’s ribs until she’s squealing, giggling. Jackie squirms away from her touch but it’s futile, impossible. She pleads, places her near empty mug onto the small table next to them as Jan loops her arms around her waist, pulls her closer.

Closer still.

“You’re just very nice to look at and I am very gay”. Jan emphasises. 

Her phrasing is stupid, funny, but Jackie understands it because the sentiment is mutual. Looking at Jan is like looking at sunshine, is like being surrounded by the light of golden hour. It’s as if Jan is a summers day and Jackie never wants to escape the heat again.

Jan’s gaze is burning through her and she lets it, gladly. 

*****

Their mugs are empty and Jackie’s phone is ringing. 

Jackie doesn’t hold back her groan. 

Jan rolls her eyes with a smile, mumbles a faint _typical_ under her breath. Jackie swats her hand feebly but can’t help but laugh along. Her phone continues ringing and she fishes it out of the pocket of her hoodie with a sigh. There are no cars passing on the street and the sound of Jan gulping reverberates around them. 

“Who is it?”. Jan voices. 

Soft and tender and curious. 

“Who do you think?”. Jackie grins. 

She turns her phone screen towards Jan, and Jan laughs at the sight of Nicky’s contact picture. It’s blurry in quality but the content is clear. Nicky is holding a half empty bottle of beer and is grinning at the camera like she’s never been happier. Jan nods towards it, encourages Jackie with a simper. 

“Answer it”. She prods. 

“Really?”.

“Answer it”. Jan repeats. 

She drawls out her words, high and whiny. Jackie looks sceptical but Jan is giddy, tipsy on the wine and the feeling of Jackie’s skin pressed against her own. The phone is still ringing and Jackie answers before it cuts off. Nicky greets her with a cheer and any plan Jan had had of staying quiet vanishes. 

“Oh my _god_ , Jackie!-“. Nicky howls. 

“-Was that Jan? Are you with Jan?!”. 

And Jan is just as excited. 

“I’m with Jan”. Jackie confirms. 

She does so with a smile that’s bright, kind. Jan thinks that it could singlehandedly light up the balcony, or the street below them, and combs her fingers through a section of Jackie’s hair. The curls that it had held at the beginning of the night have began to drop but Jan doesn’t care. 

“Well-“. Nicky starts.

“-Let it be known that I’m a god damn genius”.

*****

It gets to one in the morning and neither are tired. 

They’ve long since drank their way through the mugs of wine and are left chuckling amongst themselves, hands linked and legs intertwined. Jackie’s able to see Jan’s lipstick wearing around the edges and the creases in her eyeshadow if she looks close enough but it reminds her that Jan is real. 

“You know-“. Jan’s voice is teasing. 

“I told Nicky I thought you were cute a while back”. 

And Jackie’s caught off guard. 

“What? When?”. She laughs. 

Jan’s looking at her mischievously, has moved to rest her chin on her shoulder. Her hand as worked its way beneath Jackie’s hoodie to rest on her stomach and Jackie knows that Jan has to feel her muscles tensing. Jan’s confession has her blushing and there’s a flame ignited between them.

“A couple of months ago-“. Jan says it like it’s casual. 

“-We were at that out of state conference and Nicky kept pointing people out to me”. She laughs. 

“And you said I was cute?”. Jackie sings. 

Jan’s nod is microscopic.

Yet it’s certain. 

She lifts her chin up off of Jackie’s shoulder, cups Jackie’s cheek with the palm of her hand. Her thumb strokes across her cheekbone and Jackie can’t help but lean into it. There’s a softness that’s playful, enticing, and Jackie doesn’t want it to stop. 

“You _are_ cute!”. Jan giggles. 

Jackie places her own palm atop of Jan’s.

“And you couldn’t have told me that three months ago?”. Jackie keeps her tone joking. 

Because she knows that she probably, definitely couldn’t have. They’d never spoken for more than a handful of minutes back then and Jackie had been too focused on note taking and swapping ideas to notice the flecks of green in Jan’s eyes, her hair like silk.

Or the way Jan had been looking at her.

“I’m telling you now”. 

*****

Jackie’s lips are on hers and it feels good.

Feels right. 

“ _Fuck_ ”.

Her arms are looped securely around Jan’s waist, and Jan’s manoeuvred herself to straddle Jackie’s thighs. The wood of the bench beneath her knees is hard but Jackie’s touches are soft and Jan thinks she could stay there for hours. 

She thinks that she might when Jackie deepens the kiss, pulls Jan in like a magnet until it’s slow, sensual. 

Jackie’s hands travel up the outsides of her thighs, brush her waist and come to land on her hips. The fabric of the shirt that she’s wearing bunches beneath Jackie’s touch and it makes her long for her fingertips to be pressing against bare skin. Jan whines into Jackie’s mouth and it’s too hot. 

“ _Jesus_ ”. 

There’s a fire growing in Jan’s stomach. 

Jackie’s craning her neck in order to kiss her back with vigour, and Jan keeps whining for more. She’ll take all that Jackie will give her, all that she has; light touches become desperate grasps and Jackie’s hips are bucking beneath her own. 

Jan winds her fingers in Jackie’s hair. She tugs, tests the waters, but Jackie’s already mewling. Her hands tighten on Jan’s waist before they’re climbing higher, pressing down on Jan’s shoulders. They’re both still cloaked in Jackie’s knitted blanket and she uses it to her advantage. 

She pulls on each side, and Jan lets her. They’re pressed flush against one and other and Jan would be embarrassed about the need pouring from her akin to a fountain but not here, not with Jackie. 

Not now. 

“Want you”. Jan breathes. 

And she thinks that Jackie understands. 

“Bed?”. Jackie asks.

_Bed_. 

“Yeah-“. Jan giggles.

“-Let’s save the balcony sex for the second date”.

*****

Jackie looks down at Jan, sprawled across her bed. 

The shirt - _Jackie’s_ shirt - has slipped off of one shoulder, and Jackie becomes unable to focus on anything apart from the skin that’s revealed. It’s soft, supple, and Jackie ghosts her touch across it, watches as Jan blinks slowly up at her with doe eyes. 

Her lashes are heavy, and they brush against Jackie’s cheek when she leans down, presses their lips together. Everything is hot, needy, and Jan’s hands have already travelled back beneath the fabric of Jackie’s hoodie. Her nails scratch against the small of her back and Jackie whines, breaks the kiss. 

Jan looks sinful yet sweet, and Jackie can’t believe that she ever thought about saying no to the date.

Saying no to Jan. 

Because Jan is making her feel better than she has in a long time and it’s _crazy_. 

“Jackie”. Jan whimpers. 

“Yes baby?”. 

Jackie peppers kisses along Jan’s throat, trails them down to her exposed shoulder. She grazes her teeth against delicate collarbones, and then moves back towards Jan’s lips. She captures them with a serene smile and Jan hums into it, hooks her legs around Jackie’s frame. 

“Need you”. She whines. 

Jan’s hair is disheveled. 

Her half-up ponytail is slipping and a swipe of lipstick is smudged down to her chin. Jackie presses her thumb to it and and leaves her mark in the shape of a fingerprint. Jan smirks at her like she knows what she’s doing but bucks her hips regardless. 

“I know-“. Jackie soothes.

“-I know”. 

So Jackie kisses her again.

And keeps kissing her. 

*****

They go slowly. 

Jan lays back in a sea of teal pillows, lets Jackie peal away her shirt. 

Jackie’s own hoodie has long since been discarded and they’re left in a barely there pair of lace panties and sleep shorts respectively. They stare at each other with an infatuation; Jan feels quietly adored beneath Jackie’s gaze and is grateful for the dim lighting hiding her blush. 

Kisses swarm her body and hands work to remove her panties. Jackie tells her that she’s beautiful, whispers it in her ear, and Jan whispers it right back because Jackie is. 

Is beautiful. 

Jan slips a hand beneath Jackie’s shorts, gasps, and then they’re both touching each other, both breathing heavily. The air smells like sandalwood and sex and Jan closes her eyes, feels Jackie resting her weight atop of her. She moans into Jan’s ear when Jan’s fingers touch her for the first time and Jan spreads her legs reflexively. 

And they still go slowly. 

Because they’re both growing tired, blissed out, despite being high on each other. The sun will rise in less than a handful of hours and Jan wants to see it with Jackie. She presses her fingers harder, and they’re so in sync that Jan can feel her chest swelling. 

Jan keeps her fingers moving and it’s all that it takes. 

Jackie comes quietly, but Jan lets out a choked off moan. 

They pant into each others mouths, kiss until they’re too weak to think. Jan giggles airily and then Jackie’s relaxing, allowing Jan to burrow into her side, hook a leg across her waist. She rests her chin on Jackie’s shoulder and looks up at her with a grin. 

Jackie battles to get out of her damp shorts and Jan helps her do it. 

The room doesn’t cool like Jan has become used to on nights alone, because Jackie is there. She curls an arm around Jan’s waist, places a kiss to her forehead. It feels like a promise and Jan dares to believe that it might be when Jackie’s lips are parting, her eyes searching. 

“Stay tonight?”. Jackie whispers. 

Jan thinks that it’s a given.

***** 

Jackie’s alone in bed, but the room smells like toast. 

It’s the following morning, and she glances at the clock on her bedside table. 

The face reads a little after eleven and Jackie stretches out her muscles that feel loose, rested. The sheets are rumpled next to her and she smiles as she hears clattering coming from the kitchen, spots Jan’s lavender dress folded neatly on her chest of drawers. 

She drags herself out of bed begrudgingly, gets lost in the whirlwind of Jan’s vanilla perfume that swirls around her when she pulls back the sheets. It makes her heady but she’s unable to find it within herself to complain; she drapes a robe over her shoulders and pads to the kitchen, pauses at the sight of Jan. 

Jan, who’s switched on Jackie’s radio, has made herself at home. 

She flits around Jackie’s kitchen like it’s her own and has two plates of toast and two mugs of tea already brewing. She’s used the same rainbow cups from the night before and it’s a vision that makes Jackie smile. 

_Really_ smile.

Because her home has never felt as warm and she likes it. It feels full and good and right and Jan has removed her makeup from the night before. Jackie’s able to see the freckles dusting her cheeks for the first time and -

\- It’s as if spring is in bloom. 

Jackie clears her throat, walks her way through the kitchen. Jan’s grin is bright yet shy and Jackie brushes at her hip. Jan loops her arms around Jackie’s neck and pulls her down for a kiss that tastes of butter. 

“Do you want me to leave _now_?”. Jan jokes.

Jackie thinks about it, or pretends to. She knows what her response will be before it’s so much as left her lips and pulls Jan in closer.

“No”. She shakes her head. 

She thinks that it’s the answer Jan had been hoping for. 

“Ok-“. Jan beams. 

Her fingers thread through Jackie’s hair and with it Jan weaves her way into Jackie’s life. 

“-I’ll stay”. 

*****

They spend the rest of the morning in bed. 

Jan spends half of it between Jackie’s thighs and Jackie doesn’t argue about returning the favour. She has Jan coming against her fingers and it  works . 

They spend the day at the beach, toes in the water, and Jackie doesn’t complain when she finds herself at Jan’s house that night. 

Or the night after.

She doesn’t complain when it’s been six months, either, and she’s still waking up to the smell of tea and toast in the mornings.

And the feeling of Jan’s lips against her cheek. 

**Author's Note:**

> im also on Tumblr @ janhytes !<3


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